30 days of yoga, Uncategorized
Comment 1

Day 1: Permission to be

Candlelit Yin Yoga with Liberty @ 8:30pm – 9:30pm @ Urban Yoga – Business Bay

The perfect class for the over-worked, the over-stimulated, the over-stressed and the over-tired. Restorative yoga helps move and shape the body using carefully supported positions and movements with long holds. Each posture is held for 5 minutes or more! Leave feeling rested and more centered. Perfect as a complement in your regular practice, on days that you’re more tired or for those that are looking for a more restful and recuperative practice.


Journal entry

While the one-hour class isn’t a sweaty workout for my body, it certainly is for my mind. Noisy and loud, trying to clear it proves extremely challenging.

When I find myself drifting, thinking about my day, or what I have to do the next, I am annoyed by the thoughts that come to me. My mind feels polluted, and it’s hard not to beat myself up for even having those thoughts at a time like this. But of course, that’s the point of this to begin with; to tame those very thoughts and learn how to put them away. It’s easy to be angry at the person whose words you can’t get out of your mind, that recur in a chant, slowly grinding you down… so every time this happens, I take a minute to remind myself that the only way they’re allowed into my mind space is if I allow them in.

The room is quiet, very quiet, and I’m grateful for the ten or so yogis I share my practice with. A thought comes to my mind as I consider them, and while I don’t know anyone else in the room, the quote sticks with me throughout my practice.

Be kind, for everyone you meet is fighting a hard battle.

Throughout the class, I focus on Liberty’s soothing voice and thoughtful words, which I transform into my own mantras, helping me clear my mind of the chaotic thoughts that seem to have set up shop in the deepest reaches of my mind.  

1

“You have nowhere else you need to be… give yourself permission to be.”

2

“It’s not the things that happen to us that cause us stress; it’s the way we talk to ourselves about the things that happen to us that does.”

 

I leave the class with a quieter mind, but checking my phone on the way out, I am quickly jarred back to reality. An unfriendly email hits me like a brick, draining in its ambiguity and accusation. I feel depleted and, for a minute, hopeless. I record a lengthy voice note to Michelle, half a world away, hearing the anger in my voice as I share what has happened and why it is so upsetting, letting every ugly thought escape my mind through my lips. As I walk to the car, calming down with every step, I remind myself that allowing myself to feel this way and be so deeply affected by someone else’s typed out words is completely my fault, and not the sender’s. Sitting in the car, I write back, deciding against letting the email marinate and fester, literally sending it back to where it came from. I feel lighter for a moment, choosing to put off the inevitable weight the email carries until the next day. Why give up what I worked for in the last hour?

Seeing Lara after yin is food for the soul. Finding my seat on the living room floor, a good cup of tea in my hand, and a non-judgmental ear awaiting me make for the perfect recipe for friendship, and few people do it better than she does. I drive home afterwards feeling good about the challenge, good about yoga, and good about the semblance of control I’ve created for myself.

Later, as I lay in bed, I set my alarm for 7:10am, ready for my 8:00am flow at HAPI (and send some positive vibes to Ashley who has agreed to join me) and drift off to sleep…

Namaste

1 Comment

  1. Ash says

    Love you babe. Martine (acupuncturist extraordinaire) has reassured me that a wandering mind should not be a stressor – being able to pull yourself back to your body is where we should focus. Try not to be too hard on yourself. It’s important to remember there is no failing here. PS – I’m working on this over the month too. ❤️

    Like

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